James Joyce


Song  by James Joyce

My love is in a light attire

Among the apple trees,

Where the gay winds do most desire
To run in companies.

There, where the gay winds stay to woo
The young leaves as they pass,
My love goes slowly, bending to
Her shadow on the grass.

And where the sky’s a pale blue cup
Over the laughing land,
My love goes lightly, holding up
Her dress with dainty hand.

JamesJoyce_AFWatch the following documentary divided into three parts and take notes of the most relevant aspects of James Joyce’s life.  When it comes to understanding James Joyce it is important to know as many aspects of his life as possible and to get a taste of Dublin.  This  because all his works are autobiographical and have Dublin and the Irish at the centre of his literary works.

If you want to deepen your knowledge, you can watch other documentaries. Though these are optional, they are worth watching.

Here are ten fascinating things you may have not known about the legendary scribe:

1. The character Molly Bloom in his novel “Ulysses” is based on his wife Nora Barnacle from Galway. The novel even takes place on June 16 (otherwise known as “Bloomsday”) or the day Joyce met his future wife in 1904.

2. Joyce studied Dano-Norwegian at University College Dublin in order to to be able to read the work of Norwegian playwright Henrik Ibsen in its original form.

3. He left Ireland for Paris after completing his studies in 1902, originally moving there to study medicine.

4. The Irishman settled with his family in Pola, Austria-Hungary in 1904 but was expelled soon after in 1905 when the government uncovered a spy ring.

5. Joyce taught English at the Berlitz school of language in Trieste, Italy.

6. Joyce adopted Italian as his at-home language, having learned it while living in Italy

7. He returned to Ireland in 1909 to open Dublin’s first movie theater, the Cinematograph Volta on 45 Mary Street. Featuring Italian and European movies unpopular with the Dubliners, the cinema shut its doors in 1919.

8. Joyce’s former Irish teacher, Patrick Pearse, was one of the leaders of the April 24, 1916 Easter Rising and considered to be “President of the Provincial Government” of the Republic of Ireland.

9. Joyce underwent over 25 eye surgeries in his lifetime.

10. Before his book “Ulysses” was legally published in America in 1934, hundreds of illicit copies were seized and burned by the US Post office in the 1920s.

(source: www.irishcentral.com)



Your creative writing activity is to write Eveline’s diary when she goes back home the very day she was supposed to leave with Frank.  Then you write Frank’s diary, he is on board of the ship heading to Buenos Aires and he thinks of the moment when Eveline clang to the railing and did not follow him.

Look at this Italian modern adaptation of “Eveline”, it is evidence of how contemporary this short story can be. Do you like it? Why (not)?

The Dead

Final scene

You have already had the chance and the luck to listen to Stephen Fry.  What does he think of  “Ulysses” by James Joyce?

James Joyce is widely considered a national  treasure of Ireland. Known for such classics as “A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man”  and “Dubliners,”  he will forever be inextricably linked to his master work “Ulysses” detailing the exploits of one Stephen Dedalus over the course of a day in Dublin.

UlyssesXIt tells of the diverse events which befall Leopold Bloom and Stephen Dedalus in Dublin on 16 June 1904, during which Bloom’s wife, Molly, commits adultery. Initially deemed obscene in England and the USA, this novel, revolutionary in its Modernistic experimentalism, was hailed as a work of genius by W B Yeats, T S Eliot and Ernest Hemingway.

Ulysses comprises 18 “Episodes”. Each of these episodes was serialized separately, and each one reads completely differently. For example, Episode 14 parodies all of the great authors of the English language, going from Chaucer to Dickens, and Episode 18 is a lengthy monologue of about 10,000 words that comprises two giant run-on sentences. Every Episode reads like a completely different book, and therein lies the beauty of Ulysses.

Since each episode has a different style, knowing what to appreciate beforehand can help. As such, here is a list of all of the episodes and their brand of comedy. #*Episode 1: Normal novel.

  • Episode 2: An informal catechism.
  • Episode 3: Elitist masculine monologue.
  • Episode 4: Poking fun at the great heroes of yore.
  • Episode 5: The hypnotic nature of religion.
  • Episode 6: Death.
  • Episode 7: Making fun of journalism (it’s written like a newspaper, pay attention to the headlines.)
  • Episode 8: Food puns, everything can be eaten and everything eats in this chapter.
  • Episode 9: Making fun of Hamlet and elitists who debate over obscure pieces of literature (very much so making fun of certain scholars who would later analyze Ulysses).
  • Episode 10: This chapter has nothing to do with the main characters. It is instead presented as a bunch of short stories surrounding the side characters. The humor comes in the fact that it is largely pointless and that most of the side characters make fun of the main characters.
  • Episode 11: Everything is a music pun. A lot of onomatopoeia is used.
  • Episode 12: There are two narrators, one who is hyper-colloquial to the point of not making sense and one who is hyper-scientific to the point of not making sense. The competition between the narrators produces the comedy.
  • Episode 13: Is narrated by a young girl, and everything is a sex joke.
  • Episode 14: An elaborate parody of all the great English authors.
  • Episode 15: Written as a hallucinatory play in the red light district.
  • Episode 16: This chapter is super ambiguous, and the comedy comes from mistaking characters for other characters.
  • Episode 17: Written as a catechism, the comedy comes from the hyper-scientific question and answer format being applied to the mundane.
  • Episode 18: Streaming consciousness of Bloom’s wife.

Joyce wrote two graphic organizers. They are called the schemas. Use them to introduce yourself to the chapter. They can be found here:


and here:


Read it aloud. In an Irish accent preferably. A lot of the puns make more sense when heard.

A lot of Ulysses makes fun of Dubliners and A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man, so reading them beforehand allows you to practice reading Joyce’s style and give you background knowledge for some of Joyce’s jokes.

This is a work of comic fiction. Laugh aloud. Laugh at everything. It’s funny.

Listen to Carmelo Bene’s reflections and be inpired.

Molly Bloom’s famous soliloquy

A computer buff has solved the James Joyce riddle that has puzzled Joyceans for years – how to cross Dublin without passing a pub.

Leopold Bloom first posed the question in the Joyce classic Ulysses but now, almost a century later, the puzzle has been solved.  Joyce first set the puzzle in 1922.


Why you should read this book


Read the article from the Economist and take some notes.

This is a video that briefly explains the stream-of-consciousness to you.

Stream of Consciousness vs Interior Monologue


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17 Responses to James Joyce

  1. Simona Mastrapasqua says:

    I still have thousand doubts that torment me. Have I done well? And if it was the occasion of my life? If I could be happy with him? He loves me and I love him…Maybe. No, no, no it’s the right thing. First of all family. They brought me up, they made me become who I am and it’s right that I reciprocate. I can’t hate my family and so I will take care of them. My two brothers need my support. You can’t choose your family but we must thank God of having one. Here, I’m. My brothers play and.. my father? Oh God, here he comes! I can’t believe that he is in my room and is spying my things. Maybe he already missed me. Oh dad, I’m here, we will overcome all difficult together. I won’t abandon you. Mum, I do all this for you. I love you so much.

  2. Chiara says:


    Eveline’s Diary
    I have just returned from the pier and I saw the only man who respected me leaving without me. But I could not go away, now I’m trapped in my life as my mother was and since she made me swear, I can’t leave my father and brothers. He isn’t always so bad. At the same time now I know I will never leave this place anymore, I will never be free and I’ll always be scared of new things. I don’t want people to talk about me and the name of my family eloping with a sailor that never promised me anything for sure, but only the idea of a future far from here in which he probably would love me. And yet I can’t feel relieved, a sense of anxiety stops me and I would like to cry and scream, I have been foolish to decide to remain in this difficult life. But what should I do? A promise is a promise and I have to respect the last wish of my mother, for the sake of my family I will stay.

  3. Mattia De Camillis Baiocchi says:

    She left me! I can’t think about her stupidity. Why she returns to her family, to her father, to her cross? I offered her a life without problems, difficulties. She’s gone. How can I continue my life without her? She left me for her promise, and I understand the reason, but she hurt me. All my world and the life that I built with her fell down in a few seconds. I’m so depressed, but I must go on and follow my dreams in Buenos Aires. At this time I’m lonely and I’m lost in my mind and in Eveline’s contemplation.

  4. Valentina Porro says:

    Eveline’s diary

    Dear diary,
    now I am at home. And I feel safe. I managed to escape from the devil today. Frank wanted to bring me with him fare away from home. Home. What it is home? No, I know what it is. The fact is that I cannot find the words to explain it now. Or I will never find them.
    Father was really angry and drunk when I came home. He was hungry and I had left him with no food. Poor him. I am so selfish sometimes. Or maybe I am selfish and I will never change. I have to change because I cannot make mistakes because of it. I cannot make mistakes and let my family dying. Oh I was so stupid! I wanted to abandon my family and to leave starving them to death. I am the devil. I have the devil inside me. I had fallen in love with Frank because he is a devil too. He drove me to take the wrong decision. But I was strong and I leave him on that boat. Am I strong?
    Starting from tomorrow I will be a wonderful person. The daughter that everyone desire. I will work for my family. I will work overtime. The house will be always clean. When my father will return home and he will have some problems with his health, I will always care for him and if he will beat me, I will stay there. I will not protect myself from him. If he beats me, he is right. I always make mistakes and this is the right punishment.
    Maybe Frank loves me seriously. Maybe now he is suffering. Maybe now he is crying and he is ruing his beautiful eyes. Or maybe he is consoling himself with another girl. Yes, this is the truth, or he would have run out of the boat and he would have grabbed my arm and he would have brought me with him. Now I would have been in that boat. I would be on the deck watching the sunset. I am so selfish. How can I think these things while I know that my family have no food to eat this evening?
    It is better that I die. I will not hurt anyone anymore. But what if I die? Who will bring money home? Who will feed my family? I am so selfish. I want always to be happy and I do not care for the others. But what is happiness?
    I miss my mother. The only way that I have to be more nearer to her is our promise. Maybe when the promise will come true I will reach her and I will be happy. Again. This is my life: respect the promise.


    Frank’s diary

    Dear diary,
    I am alone on the deck. I am alone on the deck of the boat of my future. This must have been the boat of my future. She must have come with me. I am the man of her life. I am the reason of her happiness, she said to me. And I cannot realize that she was so happy ten minutes before and now she is there, cold as ice, at the port. Alone. I want to know why she took this decision.
    I hate her now. I had worked so hard to buy these tickets. I bought a house in Buenos Aires. She helped me choosing the color of the paint for the walls. I had organized everything. I had decided to marry her. And I would have had children. One day she said to me that she loves children and that she wanted to have at least two children so that can play together. She has got many brothers and sisters. And we would have got a dog too. She said that she loves dogs but that she had not enough money to feed a family and also a pet. She is lovely. She was so happy when she spoke about her past. But she has no present. I was her present. I am her present. I cannot stay here.
    What can I do? She is the woman of my life. I cannot leave without her. I love her. I will love her forever. But where is she now? She can be at home. That is not a home. That is a jail. I have a house for her. That is home. She cannot stay there forever. She is not living her life.
    Now I am so worried about her condition. She was so pale. She seemed a ghost. It was like that she cannot hear what I was saying. Her look was lost somewhere. And now I feel guilty. I had left her there. Maybe her father is beating her. Oh how horrible images! She said to me that her father always beat her when he was drunk. I want to save her. I had tried to save her. But she left me here, alone on the boat.
    Maybe she does not love me. She has got another man. It was easier for her to leave me in this way. She did not have to speak. She had only to stay there. She took advantage of me. I gave her some money and presents. I had bought her new dresses. I had sacrificed my saving for her.
    I am becoming mad! How can I think like this? I know she loves me and I know that she is a mature person. She had always told me everything. If she had got any problems or any doubts. This is our strength: we can count on each other. But why she did not tell me anything? I had understood that something was wrong. She was not smiling when we got on the boat. I cannot understand because the days before she was so convinced of her choice.
    I want to go away from this stupid boat. There is no reason that I am here and she is there. As far as I will arrive in Buenos Aires I will buy another ticket to come back Dublin and I will understand everything, I hope. And I will save her, definitely.


  5. Riccardo Sartori says:

    Eveline’s diary:

    Dear diary,
    this horrible day had told me who I really am and what is my destiny. I really wanted to change everything, but life has disappointed me, another time. Just when I was near to escape from my father, just when I was thinking about my happy future, married with Frank, passed through my mind the words mum said before die.
    I promised, unfortunately. I regret it, but I did. I promise to take care of dad and Harry, help with housework and food after mum’s death. But how could I say no to my mother will? Put yourself in my shoes, I must be more selfish and tell her that they could take care of themselves without any sort of help, neither mine, nor any other woman. However, I promised.
    I feel terrible. When I came back home, I saw an engaged young couple and in that particular moment, I collapsed into tears. I was thinking only about that poor man, alone with his question and his anger. I remember every moment I passed with him; how is possible that I left him and our future life in Buenos Aires, how?
    If only I could go back, I wouldn’t promised anything, why should I be imprisoned in this humdrum and I am not free to live my life, as all the other nineteen-year-old girls in the world did? So many questions, so many doubts. I feel like a caged animal and I am not able to live this life.
    Maybe in the next day I will write a letter to my beloved Frank. He will not understand my behaviour, even if I hope the opposite. I comprehend his disappointment, we were both excited at the idea of a new life, new country, new people. But I can’t leave dad and Harry, I loved them, even if sometimes I am angry with them. Sorry Frank, this is my life and the fate gives me this. If I could choose freely, I would have gone with you on that both wonderful and damn ship. The street organ was the straw that broke the camel’s back, unfortunately. Sorry Frank, sorry mum.
    Frank’s diary:

    Dear diary,
    anger and disappointment comes over me, they are canceling all the good time we spent together. What was wrong? Why she left me, at the iron railing, after that we had planned our future in Buenos Aires?
    I am worthless, I am not able to give a reason, I am going crazy. I know that Eveline was a girl, with upright principles and very attached to the family. But I have never thought so much. I feel forsaken only thinking about my future life in Buenos Aires, without her. Now I’m in my room but my soul and my heart are still in Dublin. I really love her and maybe, she could restart her life with me, without thinking only to her father, which was most time drunk. I said her to stop, with him, even if he is her dad, she was treated bad lots of time, he beated her repeatedly.
    But the thing that still bothers me is the fact that his dad will continue to drink, to beat her. She will not react, she had the opportunity with me to do that, but she surrended to life and to the role that she had in her family. I don’t know if I want now to see her another time, because she disappoint me; now I am angry with her and maybe I would say something that I don’t think really. However now, before dinner, I vented. In fact I cried a lot, I was desperate, and I am still now desperate; but now I’m thinking to the future in Argentina, even if the wound is still aking and it hurts a lot. This is a yet another disappointment about love, I hoped that this time was the right moment to think about the marriage, but evidently, I was wrong.
    Luckily here with me, there was a friend of mine, that I met in Dublin and that was going in Argentina because of work. He help me a lot, he understood my situation and he tried to console me. We spoke together for three hours and that help me.
    I shall thank Eveline for what we passed together in Dublin and I really hope that she explains her reason in a letter, I will appreciate it. I hope even that she will change her ideas and that she decides to come with me in Buonos Aires. But now I must think about my future, abot my work; than, if something new with her happens, I will be the happiest person in the world and you are going to know it first.

  6. Virginia Nichilo says:

    Eveline’s diary

    So I left the dock. I left Frank. And with him my heart.
    I am stupid, no point denying it! I let my only chance at happiness slip away. I could have had everything and instead I chose my ungrateful father. I have already wasted nineteen years of my life on him, and for what? A promise made to the person I wished I would never become.
    As I walked home all these thoughts filled my head but if I could have gone back I would have done it all over again. I just could not bring myself to leave my father and my brothers. All things considered I still dreaded going home though. I was unwilling to let go of my unhappy life but at the same time I could not bring myself to return to it. I was in a bit of a pickle some people might say! Maybe I did not have to return right away. I had only been gone a few hours. They could do without me for a little while. Besides I needed time to think.So I wandered through town… Just walking and thinking over the opportunity I had thrown away. It was getting dark though and they would be waiting for supper… I started walking home… Thinking things through had not helped at all!
    Oh well… I was almost to the front door, no point postponing the inevitable. I gathered all the courage and the strength I had left and I walked in to the alcohol-smelling house. Everything was how I had left it. Sadness suddenly overwhelmed me. I almost fell to the ground because I felt so grief-stricken thinking of what I had given up but suddenly my father bust through the door and started shouting at me, asking me where I had been. I though he was going to hit me as he sometimes did when he was in these mood… What happened next surprised him more than me.. He took me into his arm and whispered into my ear that he had been worried out of his mind and that he was so worried I had left. He said he wouldn’t know what to do without me and that he was so sorry for pushing me away and that he would try to get better just as long as I would leave.
    In that moment I didn’t know if to believe him or not but this was better than nothing. Maybe what he need to get better was to know that I might not always be there. He needed to know he could not take me for granted.

    Frank’s diary

    I still could not wrap my head around what had just happened! How did I end up on this transatlantic to Buenos Aires on my own? How could Eveline just leave me there? We had so many plans together… We were going to build a family. How do you just give up on that? I knew she did not really love me in the beginning but I though her feelings were true now. I guess not.
    Life goes on though. Just on this ship there are many beautiful women and I’m sure they can appreciate what Eveline just threw away. She was not anything special anyways… Just the daughter of a drunkard for which I felt pity.

  7. Laura Bortolotto says:

    From Eveline’s diary

    Such a short time has passed since those terrible minutes when I was not able to act anymore. Frank, poor man, how he must be suffering on that boat which scared me so much and seemed to me to be the symbol of death… How could I spend so much time caring about him, a boy who wanted me to leave home, my pious life, my dignity. If I had followed him, how many rumours would have risen in a few hours about me and my easy behaviour! Still, some doubts are assalting me now and then, but they are all evil, I must ignore them. They are all voices of devil, trying to punish me for not having listened to him. Alas, God’s punishment would have been much worse, much more painful. I am still longing for that happiness I own the right to have. But gaining it that way would have been a crime and perhaps I would never have been happy. Do I really know Frank? How can I be sure he was really in love with me? People are not worthy being trusted: my father was good once, but then he grew worse. It would have been the same with Frank, too… I know my usual hard life is going to make me sweat and sigh as it did before this sad day, but I cannot give up all at once as Frank wanted me to. I must forget him, wait for another fellow and for a more legal and ethical chance. Nobody has ever allowed me to act secretly and I cannot decide for myself.

    From Frank’s diary
    What the hell made her give up, this evening, how could she possibly leave me like that? What illness suddenly hit her and made her looke like a living dead who could neither see me nor hear me desperately crying, imploring her to come? I wanted her to be happy, to escape from that non-life of daughter and sister, and humiliated worker. I am the only one in this town who loves her and cares for her and what did she do? She just stayed still , she must have heard a voice, perhaps her own consciousness, telling her not to follow me. How could she trust that invisible voice, be it god or whoever, and not mine, the voice of the man who just wishes to hold her tight and to protect her? Do I have to go back to Dublin and speak to her? Perhaps I should meet her father, convince him to let her live her own life. But he already hates me anyway, it would not help.
    Is it really worthwhile to keep on thinking of that helpless and passive animal that was not a woman anymore? Had I not better reach Buenos Aires and forget her forever? I feel myself going to pieces just thinking of that possibility… But I hope night will help me make a wise decision.

  8. Lucrezia says:

    Eveline’s diary

    My dear diary, I’m here, in front of you because I have nothing to do… I feel like a boat in a wood. I don’t know what to do.. I cry, I’m sad… no,no, wait… I made a big mistake: I feel nothing! Poor me, even a dead leaf is more alive than me.
    I hope you will undestand me bacause through you maybe I could understand me, otherwise if I were without you I won’t be able to take a step.
    When I write on your paper I’m alone but at the same time I feel like I’m surrounded by a moltitude of people who love me.
    Sorry.. what have I just said?… Frank , Frank, he loves me, and I haven’t found the strength to leave my father . Why? My little diary answer me, please..
    Am I a coward? I haven’t words to define myself.
    He gave me the possibility to live a better life going far away from my problems, but I refused.
    Now I recognise that you cannot help me as nobody can enter my mind.
    Perhaps this is my punishment, in everyone’s life, unfortunately, there is a moment in which you suffer… this is mine.
    There aren’t other opportunities.
    Thanks my diary for listening to me today ,I have thought over, and now I can say :
    “Eveline, you decided your own future, it’s your fault”

    Frank’s diary

    Why? Why? What have I done to deserve this?
    People say that love has an infinite power, that it is stronger than everything…
    … But I don’t think so because this is not my case.
    I love Eveline, she is all my life, but evidently for her it is not the same.
    I would have given my life for her, but she didn’t want, she didn’t understand my feeling and my deed. I know the reason why she is pained but she is a little bit egoist.
    If she had allowed me to take care of her, maybe she would have forgotten a bit her sorrow. To my mind she should think that she is not the only human being in the world, that there are many other people that suffer.
    And what makes me crazy, is the fact that I have tried to understand her but she didn’t do the same towards me.
    I offered her a way to leave behind her painful life but… apparently we are not born to be together.

  9. Elisabetta Rossetti says:

    Eveline’s diary

    I have just made the biggest mistake of my entire life! I left Frank while the ship was leaving without saying any world. Oh poor Frank! I just acted like a bitch and he didn’t deserve all this. Fuck myself.
    But what could I do? My choice has been the least painfull for everyone: Frank is a good boy: nice, kind openhearted and so sweet. He absolutely will find someone else that will be a great wife in Buenos Aires, greater than me.
    My father can’t stay alone, he needs my help and my services. In his conditions he can’t do all the things by himself and I am the only person close to him. I had also made a promise to my dead mother: I would have never left my father, and that’s what I am gonna do till he will tell me I am free.
    To everybody this has been at least the best choice, but maybe not for me. Maybe it’s just my destiny being with a alcoholic, a violent and strict father, who sometimes can be really nice to me. Maybe this is not so bad in the end.

    Frank’s diary

    Eveline is the biggest bitch I have ever met! Guess what? she left me while the ship was leaving without saying anything. Not even sorry! Eveline, are you kidding me?!
    During my stay in Dublin I did everything to make her happy and escape from that evil father. Such a bastard he is. He stole her money to buy spirits and than he went mad if she if she hadn’t had money to buy food. When I met her I immediately fell in love because of her personality: a very nice, gentle and sweet girl. I tried to do everything to make things work, I even accepted to live our relationship secretly because she was afraid of the reaction of her father. She seemed to be happy with me and even convinced to live her life in Dublin to become my wife in Buenos Aires but in the end she went back home. Nice trick Eveline!

  10. Yana Guerra says:

    Eveline’s Diary
    Maybe today I made the biggest mistake of my life! Today my body decided to block in front of the ship, while we were leaving for Buenos Aires. I and he, I and Frank, the nicest person in the world, he could be my savior, he could carry me away from here. Why happened it? Is it maybe my destiny to stay here, to take care of my family, my drunker father and my brother? But after all it was her last desire before Death, can I not respect it? Yes, I cannot think only about myself, I have to think about my family! As she asked me. I thought that Frank will understand, even if I did not give him any explanation. He is an intelligent man, he has to understand. I don’t know if I will never free myself from this jail, but I hope that Frank forgives me, because my feelings were real and all things that i told him were sincere. I loved him, and I still love him.

    Frank’s Diary
    Today happened a terrible thing! Why? She left me alone! Eveline didn’t go aboard and I cannot understand why! Maybe she understood that she does not love me enough? And all the beautiful words that she said me? No, I do not believe in this! She is trapped in that house, her family trap her! I was almost managed to pull her out from there, with my love. I love her, I dreamed a life with her, a beautiful life, far away from her family.I could give her a beautiful life! But she made her choice and I could not even talk to her, because her hands clutched the iron in frenzy and the crowd took me inside. I tried to call her but her eyes were lost, she looked in space and se did not listen me. I had to let her go, I could not force her to come with me! I hope that one day she will understand the big mistake that she has made, and how much I loved her.

  11. Valeria says:

    Eveline Dublin
    “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star
    How I wonder what you are!
    Up above the world so high,
    Like a diamond in the sky.
    Twinkle, twinkle, little star,
    How I wonder what you are!”

    I surprised myself humming this oldie.

    When I was little, maybe two or three, my mommy used to sing this song when I was crying desperately for something. That melody seemed to reassure me after a tumble or to give me the so expected nurturance. From that moment I always associated in my mind that song with my profound sorrows.

    Weird how my mom is so aware in these moments of doubts and pains!

    Now, while I am reaching home back from the harbour, I ask myself if the fact that I am singing this oldie now, it means that I am crumpling from sorrows or if it is only fortuity.
    Frank was waiting for me on board, in his eyes I could see his deep love, his delight in leaving this country with me seeking a new life together. I was too weary. I was emotionless. I was frozen in my jail. The jail of loneliness.

    I am in my guardhouse while all the rest of the world is running by. I am fixed while all the people are making the Ring a Ring-o’Roses around me. It seems like someone is forcing me to show to the others cards, that I would have never showed instead.
    Nobody is asking me openly to share my thoughts and my pains, to make a choice, to decide once for me and not for the good of the others. Maybe I am condemn to carry for all my life the consequences of my promise. That promise that will bring me to the downfall.

    I had left the only person who made me see life with colourful glasses, full of fragrances and sponginess. Now I feel myself in a dark room and all my body is stinged by unknow tips. I couldn’t take a leap into the unknow and now I am groping in the dark.

    Frank Road to Buenos Aires
    They say that when you really love someone in some cases you need to leave that person take other ways, different from your own, but even different from the one you thought she would have taken with you.

    I cannot explain myself why Eveline chose not to come on board with me; I thought she was happy to move on, leaving her worn out life in Dublin and beginning a new sparkling life in Buenos Aires. I was wrong.

    She was not as strong as I thought she was. Only a fearful cick, that was prompted to leave his nest and that tried with all its energy not to be plunged in the almost unheard world. She seems to me as weak as a leaf that has only a microscopic part of its stem still linked to the tree and is trying to hang on it, unless the wind is trying to bring it away forever, breaking the only connection with the roots.

    I am heading to Buenos Aires now and I am still wondering if I have done enough for her,if my presence for her was meaningful, if she really needed me as she always whispered at my ears.

    Now it is time for me to get back in the driver’s seat of my life for myself only. It is time to take off in flight, without her.

  12. Giulia says:

    Dear diary,
    I have made my decision; I am going to leave my home forever but honestly, is that a good idea?
    I know that there are advantages and disadvantages in living my preset condition. Her in Dublin I have got a house, my family and my job. You are right; I have to work hard both at home and in the shop. Maybe Miss Gauen, the shopkeeper would be glad if I leave the job because she can’t stand me. She is always rude to me. But on the other hand in Australia I would be married and free. People would treat me with respect and Frank wouldn’t treat me as my father had treated my mother. What shall I do? Can you give me some advice? At the moment I am not sure of leaving my home. Is frank the right person for me? Would I really be happy with him?

    Dear diary,
    I am so miserable! I have been sailing for ten days and I haven’t understood yet why she didn’t come. She only said ‘NO’. And her face was white, passive; she looked like a helpless animal. There was no sign of love in her eyes. I didn’t realise what she was like. I was sure that she was eager to leave her violent father, her tiring job and her life with no sense but above all I believed, she was in love with me. I was wrong. But she had to tell me her decision before. We could have broken up our relationship as good friends. Now I have no idea of her reasons. Shall I fall in love again? Shall I trust in other woman?

  13. Valentina Paronuzzi says:

    What have I done?
    I was there, I could go with him. Escape.
    We could be together now, in the room of that liner, holding our hands, thinking of our future together. But now I am here, in my house, leaned against the window curtains. Oh, this smell of dusty cretonne!
    I couldn’t go away. I made a promise and I couldn’ t leave my family alone.
    My father is in the other room now. He’s sleeping; he is so quiet when he sleeps.
    I couldn’t go away, I cannot forget what I swore.
    I did it for my mother. I did it for him, even if he doesn’t always treat me like a father should. So why am I feeling so bad?
    Poor Frank, my dear Frank. What are you thinking now? You must hate me.
    We were so happy together.
    I remember the delight in your eyes when I told you that I was coming with you.
    Your smile, that beautiful smile.
    What have I done?

    You. You have ruined my life.
    I was happy before I met you! You stole my heart and before I could figure it out you’ve stepped on it. I can’t hate you because I still love you too much.
    What’s rong with me? Why did you leave me like this?
    Your eyes were so strange, so weird. I’ve never seen you like this.
    Maybe you realised that you did not really love me and you didn’ t want to come with me. That’s impossible! The day before you were so convinced! What happened?
    We wanted to start a new life, we want to live our life fully.
    You would have forgotten your family and would have gone forward, trying to create a life of your own. Just move on. No obligations, no restrictions.
    What happened to that girl that I used to know? Where are you, my sweet Evvy?
    In those eyes there was no trace of you. Just paralysis.
    I must forget you, but how can I do? I still love you.
    You will always be in my heart.

  14. Sara Nicastro says:

    Eveline’s diary

    I woke up this morning.
    I’m sitting near the window, the same from which I could see, when my mother died, that italian with his annoying music; the same where some daisys grow up from nowhere a lot of time ago. Now there are not daysis anymore, not one but the least. Its petals are falling down, I see them behind this dusty glass. It has been a week since the last time I hoovered; there were my brothers’ jackets on the empty bed, but they left for the last time some hours ago, after my father’s funeral. They’re falling down, too, they are leaving this old house to be carried on by the wind, as petals which are going to set up a new daisy somewhere else. Here I am, alone. The italian with his music – he was down here while my father was slipping away, and I had to pay him to make him go away – neither he is here, with me. My mum first, then my father and my brothers – they are all gone. Should I leave, too? Should I go to the see? Maybe Frank is still there. It was only yesterday that his ship left, wasn’t it? This is what it seems to me, but the timetable says that twenty years have passed. For me, it was just one night; I woke up this morning and I felt like a dead coming back to life. Life; anything remains to me, anything but a promise I made, which now has no more sense, as leaving now is a non-sense; the house is empty, the daisy’s dying, I should have left then. Or not?

    Frank’s diary
    Life is a chain; if something breaks it, you can repare it with another piece of iron and sail again for another island. This is what I did. I don’t know why Eveline didn’t grasp my hand that day; when a chain gets broken it’s hard to know how it happened, and it’s more important repairing it, so the ship won’t run aground. So I found another Eveline and I repaired my broken heart. It’s just a matter of know-how to go on. I have my life now -a wife, some children- I didn’t shipwrecked because of a broken chain, but I still wonder why and how did it get faulty. I’m afraid I will not know, and lucky enough there is always another island to head to and lot of iron on Earth, so I’ll have always my chains in order and something to do to fill my time.

  15. Emanuele says:

    My dear Diary,

    today I did not sail, something has stopped me. Frank was gorgeous and kind. Why do not I choose him? Should I choose him? I do not know..
    My father now is a drunker. How can I help him? Should I help him? Can I ruin my life in order to help him? This is what I promised..
    Is it legal, illegal, moral or immoral? I do not know. I am to young to understand, I am only nineteen. At my age, there are certain things that are difficult to grasp. Doubtless you understand if you love a person, or not. And I loved Frank. But you know my dear Diary, that when you are young, you are capable of doing anything. I remembered a time when I quarrel with my father because I wanted to go out with a friend of mine, but he did not let me go. So I let myself down the window and I escaped from the “reality” for a pleasure half an hour.
    I told you all this to come to say that unfortunately the unconscious plays a bad joke.
    Inside your deeper bowels there is always your biological family. This is the reason why..
    Frank would have been my salvation, my happiness in the immense, my rights to live.
    I chose to live in the present without knowing the future that awaited me.
    I committed a big error, but I repeat once again that was too strong for me. I was under control, as a puppet moved by my own unconscious!
    I would like to sail right now, but it is too late. What remains for me is to live in the remembrance, at the end of a single purpose: honour the figure of my dear mother.

    Yours Eveline.

    My dear Logbook,

    It is Monday, 8 o’clock p.m.
    G.C. 173.4 NW.
    Mistral SE.
    Weather: rough sea, rain, C. 11°.

    I am in the cabin number 247.
    The room is very confortable. In the middle there is a double bed, next to the bed there are two chests of drawers. Every single thing is made for two. I tried to change the confirmation in order to have a single room, but the single were already occupied.
    A sign of destiny, or an advice to go on? The second one.
    Too many times I gave a lot to a person and I received ashes.
    Eveline seem to be different, probably was different, but she was too young to understand what was well and what was bad.
    Probably there were other motivations in the background. I do not know.
    She never told me about her family conditions. She loved to go to the theatre to spend some time in serenity with me. This was all for her.
    In spite of everything, I am nobody to judge.
    Now I have a life which attends me, a new reality. I will buy a new house with the doubloons I earned in the last shipping. I want a big house with four large rooms, two baths, a kitchen and a romantic terrace overlooking the ocean. I will give a lot of parties with my new friends and doing so I will surely find a girl who knows how to appreciate me as I am.
    I will have a family and I will start a company of Atlantic shipments.
    I understand that they are only dreams, but I am young and I can afford to dream.

    Yours Frank.

  16. Silvia Piol says:

    Eveline’s diary page

    It’s ten in the evening and I’m still here at the quay. I’m left alone. Complete silence reigns. The shades of the evening are slowly coming. Writing becomes more and more difficult but something inside me tells me that I have to write. It’s a pressing need. I must give a voice to my own feelings. A grief is unbearable when it is wordless.

    Now I think that I’m ready to remember, ready to bear the burden of memory. Loads of memories crowd in my head. I’m in the memories’ lake and I fear I might drawn. I remember the time we first met, Frank. At first you didn’t even notice me. You were so busy talking with those men. Then for some reasons I won’t ever know, you turned your head right in my direction. Our first glance has been magical. A sudden earthquake shook my soul. My cheeks turned red. A voice echoed in my head: you were that man with whom I should have shared my life. Another memory knocks on my mind’s door. It is about that time in which you brought me to the beach. It was a Sunday afternoon. The sun shone in the sky. We spent the whole afternoon sitting on a rock telling each other about funny anecdotes from our past. At sunset we took off our shoes and refreshed our feet in the sea’s water. At a certain point I couldn’t see you anymore. After a few moments of panic I felt a warm breath on my neck. Then a tender kiss.

    It’s so hard to look back at these wonderful memories, mostly because I do it with the awareness that every moment we’ve spent together , dear Frank, is never gonna come back. We should have spent together the rest of our lives. We should have gone on board that night-boat that was supposed to take us to Buenos Aires. We should have got married. I was supposed to become your wife but I will forever be my family’s chaste wife.

    Oh mother, how heavy lies your last wish on me! You have given life to me but with your last words you’ve got that life back.

    Frank’s diary page

    I’m here on this boat. All the people around me are sleeping. Even that man over there. He looks like a seventy-year old man: he’s quite old! Though he never closed his eyes during the past twelve hours we’ve spent on this boat. Now he’s collapsed. Me, I cannot sleep. My eyes are tired but the eyes of my soul are not. They are not tired of looking at the memories we’ve shared together, Eveline. Oh Eveline, you’ve been my first and only love and though I’m only twenty I think I won’t ever love any other woman the way I loved you. You’ve enlightened my life. You’ve eliminated monotony from my existence and you’ve made every day worth living. In these last months so many projects were filling my mind. Now it’s so hard to admit that those projects are just past dreams. A new life is waiting for me there, in Buenos Aires but unfortunately it’s waiting for me only. Still I must confess that my actual position is better than yours. By choosing to remain with your family, you’ve signed your own death warrant. Oh Eveline, I cannot bear the idea that you, fragile and sensitive creature, you are going to suffer. It has been my fault! I am a foolish! I should have held you tight to me! I shouldn’t have let the crowd separate us! I should have saved your life!

  17. Mattia Pizzutti says:

    Eveline’s Diary
    Oh God!I’m not sure if I did the right thing! I had the possibility to go with a man who loves me, with a man who would have taken care of me, and what I did? I stay here, with a man who beats me, who is very violent and abuses of me every day: I don’t know if I can call him “dad”, because a father is a person who loves you and not a man who hate you! I decide to stay here in my monotous life, in my hummdrum life, when I had the oppurtinity to change my routine, my life!
    But I remember of that day, when I read her letter: of my mother, maybe the only person in my family who loved me and who I love. In the letter she asked me to keep the family unite as long as possible! I made only for her, because I love her, and I want to fulfill her wishes, and try to do what she asks me! Yes, before I decided to leave, because I had thought of my monotous and sad life and my mother’s one: I wanted to escape from it! But then that damn letter changed my mind: the love for my mother was much more than the love for Frank! Than I had fear! Fear for the future: for the uncertainty and unknowledge of future! This fear made me take a step back!
    Sorry Frank! I hope that you understand my choices, my problems, and if I know you well, I am sure you will understand: you are the most pretty, understandable and sweet person I ever met! I will love you forever!

    Frank’s Diary
    Why my lovely Eveline? Why you make me suffer? I still not understand what brought you to decide not to leave with me! My love for you was bigger than the love I have for my mother, I would have made everything for making you happy! But, maybe, you didn’t love me?!
    You chose what according to you were the right choice but you wrong: you are returned in your monotous life, with your violent father who didn’n love you as I love you!
    I’m sorry Eveline but I continue not to understand why you decide to return in this life that make you suffer, that didn’n make you happy, as I would have made! If you want to escape from this life you can: you must only come with me in Buenos Aires! A new city for a new page of your life!
    I wait for you!

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